Thursday, August 04, 2005

Are Things About to Change?

A client of mine has been bidding on a multi-million dollar contract, and told us that if he was awarded the job, there would be considerable work for us. He said that the contract would be "life changing." We've been waiting for several weeks to hear, and yesterday afternoon he called.

"We got it," he said calmly. He was almost too calm. Too many late nights had taken their toll on him, I guess.

I put the phone down for a moment and shouted to my partner, "Yeehaw! We got it!" My client and I exchanged a few pleasantries, and a few key pieces of information, and plan to meet next week.

We got the contract.

At first, I was really excited, but now that I've had a moment to process things, I really don't know what it means. Does it mean we'll finally be earning enough money? Does it mean that we'll finally be able to stop worrying about money every time we go to the store or pay bills? Does it mean we'll be able to start paying off our debts? Does it mean we'll be able to actually save some money for a rainy day or for retirement?

The end customer is a Fortune 100 corporation, so they are going to expect a very high level of customer service. I know this is going to be life changing for my client in a positive way, but I'm scared that this might not be so great for me. I'm worried it will mean another year or two of IT slavery, being on call 24/7, for inadequate money. I hope it will mean good things for us, but I've worked on many projects where I made my employers a lot of money and came up short.

I'm trying very hard not to let my fears overtake me, and I'm trying to be cautiously optimistic. I'm not worried about my ability to do the work; it's just an extension of work I've already been doing for this client, anyway. What I'm worried about is the money, and the impact it's going to have on us. I'm concered, too, what happen when the contract ends? The job is only guaranteed for a year or so. After the job ends, will we just go back to living our hand-to-mouth lifestyle?

In my 15 or so years in the IT Industry, I've never had a job where I was able to live an "abundant lifestyle." When I say "abundant" I don't mean an extravagant or wasteful lifestyle; I mean a lifestyle where there is enough money for all the basics, plus enough for savings, and extras like vacations and fun stuff. An "abundant lifestyle" would mean I'd have enough money decent housing and transportation, and to be able to keep my home and car in good repair. I'd have enough money that a trip to the dentist (I haven't been in four years) would be possible.

My best earning year was when I was living in the RV. Although I was earning enough to put the maximum into my 401(k) plan, and was paying my bills with ease, had no debt and could afford a few extras, I wasn't earning enough for "normal" housing. I lived in a cramped trailer with a dog and a cat, and it was the absolute best I could afford.

Is it possible things might change? Is it really possible?

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