A Friend Contemplating Bankruptcy

I got a call yesterday from a friend that I haven't heard from in a while. She was in tears. A few months before, she found out her boyfriend was abusing prescription drugs. She broke up with him, and he moved out, leaving her alone in their rented house.

I was under the impression she was having money problems even before her druggie boyfriend moved out. When she called yesterday, she told me she had a $700/month shortfall in her cash flow, and she was thinking of filing bankruptcy.

I told her that she should regard bankruptcy as a last resort option, and that if she was going to do it, she needed to make darn sure that she'd be able to pay her bills and, more importantly save money, after she filed and her debts were discharged. I told her that bankruptcy wouldn't do her any good if she was still coming up short a few dollars every month. I told her that if she couldn't solve the cash flow problem, filing bankruptcy would make things even worse.

She had apparently called several of the non-profit credit counseling services, and they all told her that they couldn't help her because she wasn't making enough money. They recommended that she file bankruptcy.

I told her she was going to have to make some hard choices and figure out how to get her living expenses lower than her income. That might mean moving to a smaller place, getting roommates (both which will be tough, considering she has a large number of pets) or getting a second job. I'm not sure if she heard me, because she didn't like what I was telling her.

"I didn't call you for advice," she whimpered, "I just wanted to know what your experience was."

My experience? My experience with bankruptcy is that it sucks. I'm ashamed that I had to go through it. It was my own stupidity that got me there, and it's not a road I would recommend to anyone. I told her that, in my experience she wouldn't be able to get any kind of credit for several years, landlords wouldn't want to rent to her, and that employers might regard her as less desirable. I told her she needed to solve her cash flow problems first, before she filed, so that she didn't incur more debt after her bankruptcy that she wouldn't be able to pay.

I told her that this was a time for hard choices, and she was probably going to have to do some things that were uncomfortable and not fun. Suddenly, she had to go because her cell phone was ringing with a call from work and that she'd call me back later.

I never heard back from her. I guess she didn't like to hear what I had to say.